When is the Right Time to Bring Up Credit Score in Dating?

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There are some things you just don't talk about on a first date, like marriage, how much is in your retirement account, and your exes. Credit score, however, is something that's going to come up eventually in your relationship. And, while the first date may not be the right moment, when is?

Credit scores and generations

Well, for starters, that depends on how old you are.

Not every generation puts as much weight into credit scores. The average FICO score in the U.S. as of October 2020 was 711, but if we look at the data, it varies by generation.

Source: Experian

Generation Z has the lowest average FICO score, as young people likely have relatively short credit histories and may have greater debt with student loans, car payments, and the like. Meanwhile, the Silent Generation has the highest average FICO score, as people 75 and older are more established and more likely to have paid off their debts, such as mortgages.

Similarly, younger daters may not be as concerned about credit scores when dating because they may not be looking for something serious, and they're not thinking about things like buying a home yet. Also, they simply might not think a poor credit score is a dealbreaker-then again, it could depend on how bad we're talking. A "very poor" FICO score is anything below 579, which falls into subprime lender territory and could make you a subprime suitor.

Of course, it's important to keep in mind that FICO score and credit score aren't the same thing. Your FICO score is just one of your credit scores, but there are others, like VantageScore, that some creditors and lenders rely on to determine your creditworthiness. The "very poor" range for VantageScore is quite a bit lower at 300-499.

Mo' money, mo' problems?

The Notorious B.I.G. may have been on to something among the über-rich, but among us mere mortals, the song may have been more accurate if it was "Mo' Debt, Mo' Problems."

Money is one of the biggest topics couples argue about and is also among the leading causes of divorce, so it's important to get on the same page about finances early on in a relationship-and that includes the credit score discussion.

Credit and debt can be a hugely important part of a relationship, especially if you're in it for the long haul. If your partner has a bad credit score, it can impact your score if you have joint accounts. Their score could also affect your ability to qualify for a mortgage or influence the rate you're offered. 

In a way, a credit score can reveal how committed someone might be. If someone has a bad credit score, that shows that they may not be the most responsible with their finances, which could translate to how mature and committed they are to being in a relationship.

But it's not just "bad" credit scores that can be a turn off. If there's a big gap between your score and your partner's score, that could potentially cause enough of a financial strain to end things.

Much like having similar values and interests, having similar credit scores could put you in better position to last-so the pressure of having mortgages and loans in your name doesn't always fall onto one person.

The bottom line

Discussing finances can be delicate, no matter how well you know someone. Maybe the credit score conversation isn't a topic for the first date, but if you make it to a second date and beyond, the sooner you have that uncomfortable talk, the sooner you may be able to figure out if you're a good fit for one another.

Just remember, honesty's the best policy. So if you're more likely to lie about your credit score than your age on a date, then you may want to focus on boosting your credit score.